Hay Happens and Hay's Happen

Such a bittersweet day—our last day of 6th grade. We started most mornings with a cozy breakfast, sometimes a surprise, and always a Bible verse to set the tone. From there, we’d ease in with bellwork, warm-ups, and of course, daily writing. You tackled fun and challenging grammar using the four levels, and you learned 147 stems! We refined five-paragraph essays, practiced critical reading strategies, and worked through math until mastery—moving from struggles to confidence.

Many days, I didn’t feel well. I had to lie down again after we started, but I showed up. And you did, too. You had your own challenges as we searched for the right ADHD support. I wrestled with the idea of medication, but we finally found the right fit—and what a difference that made. It was hard, but necessary, to face how ADHD affects everyday life.

You kept writing your book about Blosl—you’re on chapter 3 already! You read nearly a book a week, wrote daily, and in March, something special happened: Aunt Connie moved to Arizona. That bond between you two has blossomed beautifully. Weekly art days with her have become something you both treasure, and I know they’ve added a layer of joy and creativity to your weeks.

We also made the brave decision to leave the COOP mid-year, and I know now it was absolutely the right choice. This shift brought us closer—more like sisters, really. We’re entering 7th grade not just older, but stronger, wiser, and more connected.

This summer, we’ll keep going with history, math, and your favorite: reading. And of course, you’ll keep writing your book.

Here is an example of a final writing assignment. We watched an episode of the Twilight Zone and I had her write:

Sometimes, getting everything you want isn’t actually as fun as it sounds.

In A Nice Place to Visit, an episode from The Twilight Zone, a man named Rocky thinks he’s in Heaven because he gets everything he asks for—like money, girls, and winning every game. But soon, he realizes that having everything all the time is actually really boring. The episode teaches that too many worldly pleasures can feel empty and annoying after a while. Things like fame, riches, and being popular may sound amazing, but they don’t always lead to real happiness. 

At the start of the episode, Rocky dies during a robbery and wakes up in a fancy place with anything he wants. A man named Pip tells him he’s in “the good place,” and Rocky is super excited. He asks for beautiful girls, a cool apartment, and tons of money. And he gets it all right away. At first, he thinks it’s awesome. He never loses a game, he always wins, and everyone loves him. But after a while, Rocky starts to get tired of everything going his way. 

The girls around him don’t feel real. They just do whatever he wants. The money doesn’t mean anything because he doesn’t have to work for it. Even when he tries gambling, he always wins, and that takes away the fun. Rocky realizes that when life is too perfect, it’s not really living at all. There’s no challenge, no excitement, and nothing to look forward to. He starts to feel bored and even a little sad. 

By the end of the episode, Rocky begs Pip to send him to “the other place” because he can’t stand being in this so called paradise. Then Pip laughs and says, “This is the other place.” That’s the big twist. What Rocky thought was Heaven was actually his version of Hell. It shows that too much of a good thing—like money, fame, and girls can become the worst thing ever. Without hard work or meaning, all those things don’t make you truly happy.  

So, even though A Nice Place to Visit starts off looking like a dream, it actually turns into a nightmare. The episode shows that worldly pleasures might seem fun, but they get old and tiring when they’re too easy to get. At first, Rocky loved the idea of a perfect life. But in the end, he learned that real joy comes from the ups and downs, not from always getting your way. 

I love you, Tot. I’m so proud of who you are becoming.

Today, I woke up not feeling as youthful as I KNOW I am. It was a TOUGH health day…man, like a MACK truck hit me and I fell 10 steps behind. Sadly, it was the same day as my birthday.

No worries, I’d make it a bit memorable. I decided to make Tot a happy brekkie. Before that, I noticed my honey left me a surprise in the bathroom.

Oh, so kind. Very thoughtful.

Brekkie and school time!

We are wrapping up this week, AND preparing for the BIG TOT Move! She is moving across the hall back to her old bedroom (the HAYVEN). SO>>>>>>we dove through the closet which had ALL of her toys/memories/games/life. AAAHHH How is it that these are past?

These piles here are saved for her kids. HER KIDS!! WHAT!? Like we are planning for her children already. But, hey, that is what my mom did for me. She saved ALL my baby stuff.

Happily, she is saving her PLETHORA of stuffies.

Now we are going to go through the books next. YIKES! We have 2 rooms full, so we definitely can pare down.

So many people reached out today to make me feel special. Sadly, I was just so sick that I couldn’t enjoy it. We will celebrate on Thursday.

One thing that STOOD OUT was an email I got from our DEAN of the College of Ed at GCU:

15 years. Sheesh! That is just so cool…so amazing.

I’m so grateful to my family and GCU. Thank you, Jesus for all my blessings.

She sang and spoke today!!! Oh, what a joy to see her be so poised and articulate.

This was the chapel, so it always brings back happy memories. This was the bathroom mirror for which prepped for my WEDDING!! I had to take a shot.

A bit older and wiser. And happier in some ways. In others, I’m waiting for that day of pure healing. We are on that journey.

So proud of my Tot. So grateful for my life.

That impress the SOCKS off me!

“Where the Pines Whisper”

By Tatum Hay 

May 2025

The last place anyone saw her was near the edge of the woods, just before sunset. The wind had picked up, sweeping away the sound of her laughter like it was never there. Now, the forest stands silent, as if holding its breath.

Fourteen-year-old Elara stands at the tree line, the world behind her fading into shadows. In one hand, she grips a flickering flashlight. In the other, she clutches her sister’s favorite stuffed bunny—its ears floppy, one eye missing. A frayed pink ribbon is tied around her wrist, the one she found tangled on a low branch. Mira’s.

Elara swallows hard and steps forward.

The trees creak softly in the wind, like they’re speaking to each other in a language made of leaves and bark. Their tall, dark shapes close in the farther she goes. The light from her flashlight barely cuts through the gloom. She calls her sister’s name once—“Mira?”—but the sound seems to vanish between the trees.

Still, she walks.

Every step feels heavier. Every shadow seems to move when she’s not looking. The bunny swings from her hand like a heartbeat. Something ancient watches from deeper in the woods. She can feel it. But Elara doesn’t slow down.

She thinks of Mira’s gap-toothed smile. The way she danced through puddles and made up songs about clouds. The way she ran off chasing a firefly, giggling, just before she disappeared.

No one else believed Elara’s story about the wind sounding wrong, or the trees shifting. No one else was willing to go into the forest after dark.

But Elara isn’t turning back.

She doesn’t care what’s waiting in the dark.

She came to bring her sister home.

NUMBER 2. This was one was to have stems in it.

The Secret of Sanctum Hill

Mira was just helping clean her aunt’s old cottage when she found something strange. Behind a loose board in the wall, she felt something tangible. It was a dusty old journal that looked super old, like it had been there forever. When she opened it, the pages seemed to glow, like they were trying to illuminate some kind of secret.

There were drawings of bones—like something from an osteology book—and notes about a hidden crystal under Sanctum Hill. It said the crystal had the power to liberate people from fear. Mira didn’t really know what that meant, but reading the journal made her feel inspired, like she needed to find it.

The next day, she followed a map from the journal to a spot where two paths met at an old junction. As soon as she stepped onto the stones, the ground erupted, and a staircase opened up. It was dark and creepy, but lights turned on by themselves as she walked.

Mira kept hearing weird clamors in the distance, like whispers or voices. It was scary, but also exciting. When she finally reached the end of the tunnel, she saw a glowing crystal floating in the air. The walls shimmered around it. She felt totally animated, like this was something she was meant to do.

She didn’t know exactly what the crystal would do, but she knew this was just the beginning.

From the very first moment I laid eyes on Tatum – my heart changed forever. I had become a mother. And not just any mother… Tatum’s mom.

What a joy. What an honor.

Tatum has been lighting up my world ever since. Her smile, her curiosity, her heart — they make every single day worth waking up for.

She teaches me just as much as I teach her, maybe even more. And the fact that I get to be not only her mom but also her teacher? That’s the sweetest gift wrapped inside an already incredible blessing.

Homeschooling her isn’t always easy, but it’s always beautiful. We learn together, laugh together, cry sometimes too — and through it all, we grow stronger. She sees me at my best and at my worst, and somehow, she still thinks I’m the best mom in the world. That humbles me. It pushes me to keep showing up with all I have — for her.

She spoiled me today!

And through the highs and lows, I’m not alone. I’m married to the most loyal, kind-hearted man I’ve ever known. Doug is steady, selfless, and endlessly supportive. He loves us so deeply and shows it in a thousand quiet ways every single day. Watching him love Tatum has made me fall in love with him all over again — again and again.

And he reminds me every day..especially today:

Then there’s Cooper — our sweet, adorable dog who fills our home with cuddles, wiggles, and the kind of joy only a pup can give. He’s part of the heartbeat of our little family, right there with us through every chapter.

Motherhood isn’t picture-perfect — it’s more like a beautiful mosaic made of messy, honest moments. But being Tatum’s mom is my life’s greatest role. I am grateful, I am honored, and I am filled with joy.

I even get a bonus son: AUSTIN. A lovely text from him. The kindest words.

I even celebrated Tatum being a MOMMY to her baby birdies.

Every bedtime story, every giggle, every hard conversation, every prayer we whisper together — these are the threads weaving our story. And I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

I get to be her mom.
I get to be her teacher.
And that, to me, is the biggest joy on Earth.

AMEN!

Sometimes I look in the mirror and see someone who looks… well…. Hair curled, fresh polish on my nails, maybe even a new pair of glasses to help me “see” things in a different light. I’ll throw on a cute shirt or try something new, chasing a spark of joy. And sometimes, just sometimes, it helps.

But often, the outside doesn’t match the inside.

Because inside, I’m tired. I’m hurting. I’m sick. And it’s a kind of an invisible ache that no one can see but me. It’s hard to explain, even to the people I love most. I miss being with friends. I miss feeling lighthearted. I wish they could understand how heavy this walk can be.

It’s lonely.

And that’s where the real lesson about pretty begins. Because pretty was never meant to be skin-deep. Pretty isn’t about the gloss or the glow—it’s about the soul. The heart. The inside parts that can only be filled by One person: Jesus.

He gets me. On the days I can’t explain the pain or fake the smile, He sees. He knows. And He doesn’t ask me to be shiny—He just asks me to be with Him. He is my Pretty Maker. He reminds me that my worth isn’t in how I look, but in Whose I am.

Still, I try. I’ll always try—because God made me a girl. A daughter. Someone who longs to feel beautiful and seen. That desire is part of the design. And I am so grateful for the little things that help—like curling my hair or finding a cute top. They’re not bad things. They’re just not everything.

I thank God every day for Doug. My husband, my anchor, the one who sees all the hard and still tells me I’m beautiful. He never gives up on me. He reminds me that I am worth loving, even when I don’t feel lovely.

And then there’s Tatum. My daughter. My gift. The way she looks at me—like I’m her safe place, her superhero, her mommy—it makes me feel ultra pretty.

And my mom. She raised me with love and truth, showing me what it means to be strong. I carry that wisdom with me every single day. Even when I feel like I’m falling apart, I hear her voice reminding me: You are loved.

Does the outside matter? Sure, a little. But the truth is, the real pretty—the kind that doesn’t fade—is the kind Jesus fills inside of me. That’s the kind I want to radiate.

So today, if you’re tired… if you’re aching behind the makeup or the fresh manicure, remember: You are still pretty. Because you are deeply loved by the One who made you, and He delights in calling you His own.

And that’s the most beautiful truth of all.

Backstory: Tatum wanted a VR. Yep…. a $400 device that is a virtual reality machine.

Well, that required some work because she had to sell her Nintendo, raise some funds, save some money from reading…etc. It was a big purchase for her!

This excitement lasted a week or so, and then she changed her mind. The glasses gave her a headache, and she wanted a tumble track for gymnastics (instead) ( a better choice I believe!). DONE..she decided to return it and buy the tumble track.

We packaged it up neatly, and printed out the UPS label. Next, we dropped it off at the UPS store. Now, I go to a certain store all the time, but for some reason, we went to a different store this time. AND I did not get a receipt! (MY BAD) This was a Friday.

By Monday, I did not see that it had even been scanned by UPS. Tuesday..nothing. That is when I went into the store to see what could have happened. The woman at the counter scolded me for not getting a receipt, and told me it should be fine. She was not the nicest person…honestly she was a bit rude, and I just let it go.

Then, Wednesday, I went in again and I said to her,

Ma’am, it is just so weird! I know I should have gotten a receipt, but would anyone at your store be aware of this or could something of happened?

She then said,
You are accusing us of stealing!! I take offense to that.

Oh…boy, I didn’t mean that at all!

NO, I just am not sure what to do! I hope you can understand.

She did not…not at all. She gave me the number of the manager and I went on my way…I was shaking with frustration, hurt and anger. I called the manager and told the story. NO RESPONSE.

Well, when I got home, I told Tatum the story. Tatum was FURIOUS and said,

Mommy, I want to go in and talk to her! This is not OK!!

I hemmed and hawed as I felt this was really not for her to deal with. BUT SHE INSISTED>

OK. Here we go. We headed to the store and walked in.

Tatum went right up to the counter and told the woman the story of how she saved for this machine and where could it be? She also told the woman that “my mom would never be rude or accuse anyone of stealing.”

The woman was VERY rude back to Tatum, and I finally just said,
Here is my number if you find it. And Thank you.
WE LEFT>

Ok…HERE IS WHERE IT GETS GOOD.

I walk out to the parking lot with Tatum and this woman comes right up to me. (She was in the store and witnessed our interaction).

As she approached me, I felt like I was going to get a lecture about Tatum. I’m used to people telling me how to parent.

She says:
May I say something!? I have never ever ever seen anything like this!!

(I tightened up and waited for the other shoe to drop…How could I let me daughter do this..yada yada.)
BUT NO!!!

She continued: “This was the most AMAZING thing I have ever seen for your daughter. Mom, you should be proud. I’m a therapist and I couldn’t believe how brave your daughter is!!”

I started to tear up.

She spoke directly to Tatum:

Sweetie, you did such a brave thing standing up to that woman with such poise and kindness but with strength.

We chatted for a few minutes about ALL DAY EVERY DAY she works with kids who cannot even order a meal for themselves. SHE WAS SHOCKED and amazed. She even gave me her number. She said, “I’m going to call my mom right now and tell her this story. “

THIS IS WHAT SHE TEXTED ME:
Hi Stephanie!

I  am sorry for the delay… we are having all of my family in (staying with me from the Midwest) for my brother’s wedding Friday … (so yesterday I was so frantic preparing)…

I just wanted to say that your example in the store was so incredible, and I could tell Tatum is such a grounded, well spoken young lady… it was really a blessing to witness her confidence and sweetness.

THIS IS WHEN I GOT IT. Even if the package was stolen, lost or gone, (And I lose $400), it was a HUGE lesson for Tatum. She learned to be strong in the midst of challenge and ANOTHER noticed. (I believe that this woman was a messenger from God) Tatum told me she isn’t scared of what people think because she is used to rejection and disappointment. This woman AFFIRMED Tatum and also made me see that I’m a good mom. (Tatum even said to the woman, “MY MOM IS THE BEST.”

Sometimes we need these reminders. He uses situations like this to teach us. I wouldn’t have prayed that I lose money to learn these things and to be reminded about how strong my kid is (and is becoming), but that is how God works…mysteriously.

Now, if it gets rectified, then great. If not, well, this was a day to be remembered.