It had been a long time coming. This discussion.
Yes, I had played it and rehearsed it in my head about one thousand times.
I also had laid quite a foundation about how Tatum came into the world with me as her mommy. Every single day, multiple times a day, she hears me PRAISE God for giving me Tatum and allowing ME to be her Mommy. She sees and hears me weep often for this gift. I make a BIG deal out of the day I saw her in the hospital (the FIRST day she was born). Why? So it is cemented in her head that it has been she and I since SECOND ONE.
I read multiple books (and have been since she was two) about how families are formed in various ways, and how some children (well, in the books there are bears, kangaroos, or birdies instead of kids) come to mommies and daddies with much prayer! Some are born in tummies; some are born in hearts. Tatum knew she did not come from my tummy but from my heart. She also knows there has never been a daddy, and she is assured that her Father in Heaven is her REAL daddy. (she’s NEVER been abandoned or unwanted).
But, lately, it’s become complicated. More questions have come, and they don’t come when we are are snuggling on the bed. Nope. They come when we are at the pool or in the grocery store.
“Mommy, how could I have not come from your tummy?”
Or a couple of her friends approaching me asking,
“Where is Tatum’s daddy?” (she answers with “He’s in heaven; that just confuses her friends)
She also has a couple of adopted animals from Bobby. He purchased a tiger and an elephant for her and she has the certificate of adoption. She equates adoption with a dog or some other animal. Not a child.
That was probably the straw that prompted me to share it all. I wanted her to be equipped as friends ask her questions AND I wanted her to know that word.
ADOPTION. It’s a beautiful word.
I came home early from school, and Doug and Mama were present. (They could both endorse what I was saying and Doug could share about Austin being adopted) I wanted it this way. I talked to her about how our family came to be and how she was adopted. She needed to know she was made by a man and a woman, but I had the blessing of being given the gift of being HER mom. (I don’t want her to think that being a single mom is the best way and that having a baby should be between a man and woman!) She has seen the pics of me cutting the cord, and me being present from the first second.
She listened and it was absolutely wonderful.
More questions will come. I know it. BUT our bond is STRONG, and NOTHING will ever break that.
I love you Tatum Isabella Knight. You are a precious gift from God.
