Hay Happens and Hay's Happen

We finally made it back to the Train Park last night! The last time we went at Christmas was 2019!

Oh….WAIT a MINUTE!! 2020!

Back then, Tatum was little and everything felt magical: the lights, the whistles, the “up and down!” Geez, from ages 1–6, we practically lived at this place. It was our little world.

And now she’s 13.
Different season. Different energy. Not the same “OOOMPH” as those early years, and honestly, that’s okay. We waited in the train line. Not as bad as years yonder since this year they had “ticketed entry.”

This time, it wasn’t about recreating the old FUN… It was more of a sweet reminiscing to what used to be. A “we were here once” kind of night. AND, I WENT OUT AFTER FIVE!! Again, a new normal.. I pray..

Ok, onto the train. Pics for the “mommy” everyone.

and with my other honey. HHH

Note the UGGs. Any excuse to wear these! Yes, they are 20 years old. Yes they are filled with delightful scrumptious sheepskin, and YES, it was about 70 degrees. HA! Ok, cute but posed. Still…cute.

Here we go…into the TUNNO…TUNNO!! (tunnel). No, she didn’t say it, but I did in my brain. What happened to the years!? Ok..snap out of it.

The carousel (aka the “up and down,” as toddler Tatum used to call it) brought a little gem of the old days.

Yes, I was on my high horse. HA!

Snowman, where are you here in Scottsdale?

The lights were beautiful. The air was chilly (sorta). And even though her excitement looks different now, she was there with us…. present, smiling, humoring the nostalgia.

The S’mores made it all worth it, eh?

It wasn’t the same as 2019, but I had my two favorite people with me.

The mommy? VERY HAPPY.

And…..the piece de resistance?
Coopy under the tree waiting for us when we got home.

Taties was invited to her SBC youth small group movie/PJ/junk-food-o-rama night at her leaders house, and Doug and I had a night at home. He had just put up the train for around our tree. Glory it is SO cute and Coopy-worthy. He loves being under the tree, but now he has entertainment.

I also spent the day crock-potting a corn, sweet potato, chicken chowder. It turned out pretty good after pureeing it and adding this and that.

I added a little greek yogurt, cilantro and bacon (because c’mon!) and voila!

He showed me his work station. It is now “HHW-ized” so he is always reminded how much I love him.

So cute!!
We also ate to “Tesla” light. Very romantic, eh?

It was a fun night. I am so grateful for my family.

Lord I neeeeeeeed you.

Tatum has had some ROUGH days and PLUS she is going through some heavy emotions (welcome to puberty). So, I told her, these are Mommy’s rules for staying cheerful DESPITE life curveballs (which are going to happen ALL THE TIME. BUT, Hay’s Happen, right!? They make good choices.

1. I start my day with God.

• I thank Him for another day.
• I pray for others first and then for myself
• I ask Him to guide my attitude and my words

2. I stay busy with things…accomplish

• Cooking
• Cleaning
• Crossing off tiny tasks

3. I shift focus off myself and think of someone else

• A text to encourage someone
• Doing a small chore for someone
• Preparing something thoughtful for Doug or Tatum (like cook!..or postit/email)
• Praying for a friend who needs it

4. I do something creative

• Draw (not as much L)
• Write
• Plan/make something fun…It’s USUALLY SMALL! 

5. I move my body

• A short walk (around the house!..for me it’s little)
• A stretch (gym if I can)
• A quick tidy-up that gets me moving

6. I speak truth to myself…not feelings (or pray!)

• “This moment won’t last forever.”
• “My feelings aren’t facts.”
• “I can choose a different direction.”
• “God is with me right now.”

7. I choose a small win; and be happy about that!

Just one.
It could be:

• I finished my work..
• I drank my water today..
• I emailed a friend..
  Momentum follows.

8. I get outside for a MINUTE even

Even two minutes of sun changes my whole mood

9. I limit spiraling (too much screen time) 

• I put my phone down
• I take a break from overthinking

10. I remind myself of who I want to be

Not “perfect,” just: (As Jesus would want)

• Calm
• Kind
• Steady
• Loving
• Present

LORD WILLING!!! I put my hope/trust/faith in HIM.

This pulls me back to center. AMEN!

Walk outside. (with the Coopyhead)

SO PRETTY!!!!! And we have a Candy Cane tree! OF course the Nativity scene.

I LOVE HOW lit up it is but more importantly the meaning of all these lights. WE LOVE JESUS!!!

Tatum and Coopy love Jesus too, but they show it by enjoying a meat stick or a piece of chocolate. HA!

December is off to a great start!

There’s a whole story in these pictures… little snapshots of us through the years. We have lived through a lot of good and bad times, but (especially the hard ones), our love keeps deepening.

This year, Doug turned 65, and we celebrated! Tatum made the sweetest homemade card.

I made your apple birthday treat with whipped cream because you always deserve something homemade.

And you opened all your gifts..hacksaw and all (since you love to fix all of our problems and you DO!) Some polisher for your car, a calendar, a new fancy water bottle, a NEW WATCH!!

Oh, and COOPY watching:

But the real celebration for me wasn’t the gifts or the cake.
It was YOU.

It was looking at you that day:  I love this man so much. I love the life we’ve built. And I am so grateful for him.

You have been:

• My steadFAST ground through every unpredictable twist of my health journey
My protector, and the one who looks at me with love even on the days I don’t look or feel like myself (OFTEN!)
The most tender, patient father to Tatum
Our breadwinner and our rock (Truly a KINGDOM MAN)
The fixer of sinks, broken doors etc, and the one who turns the outside of our home into something spectacular lights, trees, flowers, fountain and all
Still the HHH I fell in love with
The encourager who reminds me I’m stronger than I think
The loving, loyal, hardworking man I prayed for before I ever met you
You are truly getter younger and stronger.

We have weathered a lot.
Storms that tried to knock us down.
Doctors, symptoms, fear, grief, exhaustion.

Through all of it, you’ve held my hand; literally and figuratively in every season.

Maybe that’s why that little crocheted penguin feels so perfect:

“Just like penguins, we are soulmates forever.”

Because that’s what we are.
That’s what we’ve chosen to be: again and again, year after year.

And I just want you to know this:

I see you.
I appreciate you.
I admire you.
And I love you so much.

Thank you for loving me so much
Thank you for loving Tatum so unconditionally.
Thank you for showing up every day; for this family, for our home, for our future, for me.

You’re 65, and honestly… you’re still the HHH I fell in love with.
Happy, happy birthday, my love.
Here’s to more years, more memories, and more of this crazy life with you.

A perfect day with my favorite aunt and cousin. (well, Kas and Kell are my favs!)

I miss seeing them so much, but Tatum is getting to enjoy seeing them. They picked her up bright and early at 7:45am. Off they went to Desert Botanical and OH did they have fun!

Coffee in hand, they are ready to see some flowers and birdies!! It was such a gorgeous Phoenix weather day too. Check out this hybrid odd cacti!

and OOOOOOH the beautiful birds!!

A cactus WREN!!!

and of course a butterfly!

So grateful for them taking Tatum. She really had the best time and came home with remnants of leaves the she collected and a beautiful amethyst. I LOVE YOU ALL!

Thanksgiving this year came with a different kind of weight. I woke up in that state: the one where my body says, “Not today… bed only.”
But the holiday didn’t care, and neither did the people I love. They were coming. I wanted so badly to be the hostess with the mostess… yet all I could really offer was: I’ll show up. (oh and make some butternut squash in my WONDROUS oven)

And maybe that was enough.

Thank God for Doug.
Truly.

He took over the turkey like an absolute champ: carving, basting, making gravy.. He never made it feel like a burden.

He also bought me the most gorgeous sunflowers, bright and golden in the center of the table, almost like they were cheering me on: You’ve got this. One moment at a time.

Tatum helped me with the table; together we set the table with autumn plates, plaid napkins, and our gratitude jar filled with the questions she helped cut, fold, and tuck inside.

She wished there were more kids around, but she smiled anyway. Coopy was ready for guests by waiting by the door, and Ollie was ready to see our family.

Austin arrived before I was ready, but honestly?
It was fine. More than fine.
He got time with Doug, and I got a moment to breathe, gather myself, and shake off the pressure to be “on.”

Then my mom came. Sweet as always. She brought whipped cream… but forgot the pie.
Austin, once again to the rescue, ran to Fry’s (thankfully open) and saved dessert. We laughed about it, because what else can you do?

So it was time to take PICS by the tree! My mom is so pretty. She loves Tot so much. It’s so easy to ADORE OUR KIDS! Here I get to be with both.

And then my honey. He looks so good! He’s been losing a few pounds and he really is feeling better I believe!

TIME TO EAT!!

Taties wanted Ollie to join. Coopy, you don’t get to, SAWY!

By the time we all sat down, Mom smiling across the table, Tatum standing on her toes behind us, and Austin ready to dig in…I realized:

It didn’t matter that I wasn’t at 100%.
It didn’t matter that the sides were “easy” and that Doug did most of the heavy lifting.
It didn’t matter that I couldn’t be the hostess I envisioned.

What mattered was that we were there.

Together.
Grateful for each other.
Grateful for the day, even if it wasn’t perfect.
Grateful for God’s grace in the middle of weakness.

We enjoyed our question strips which prompted some nice convos.

With help, love, and laughter it turned into a really beautiful Thanksgiving.

A quiet one.
A simple one.
But a good one.

Thank you, Jesus for my family.