Kick Balls not Walls

She repeats this now when we eat. She looks squarely at me with a full mouth and says, “Mommy? Kick balls…not the walls.”

Yes, she is correctly repeating a bit of admonition I shared with her the other day while eating breakfast, as she was kicking the wall with her feet while sitting in her lobster. 

Saying “NO” and “DON’T DO _____ XYZ” is ineffective. It also teaches her that nasty N word we just love to hear from our toddler. Instead, I’m trying out positive statements.

Yes, you may have your baba at dinnertime!
Yes, you may have a snack when we get home.

Yes, you may sit on the chair and not on the table.

Absolutely! You may have the brush when I am finished….

You get the idea.

The NO statements come in the form of pure reprimands like letting go of my hand when in the street. OR..running away from me when I come to get her from a dangerous situation. (etc.) I want to make those times seriously NNNN OOOO!!!

These simple little ideas help her to be kind also at public places and it comes in handy. At Starbucks with Nyla and Kelly, she sat in a big girl chair and ate with us. When she was finished she figured she would get down. First, Nyla had to have a selfie




Then Tatum plopped down and what did I say?

Yes! you may get down when we are all finished. She looked at me, hopped back on her chair without too much fuss.
Reality? We only lasted a few more minutes, but …hey!…it worked for that moment, and for that I am thankful.


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