What was that NOISE!? Oh, my goodness

It was my calf muscle! I was coming down from a step and I heard a horrific pop/snaaaap/crrrrraaackkkk (not necessarily in that order) noise. It felt like someone punched me in the back of the leg. Trying to stand up, I fell down because I could not put ANY weight on my leg. This is when I knew I had perhaps torn my calf muscle. The first thing that popped in my head was HOW WILL I TAKE CARE OF TATUM!? A big wake-up call of the dependence this little girl has on me. I can’t be out right now!

Tearfully, I immediately called my mother, and questioned what to do next. Of course, I had to get myself to a Dr. but WHO!? Healthnet did not help much, but I checked the list and started calling THE LIST. This was not at all fruitful. February 19th is not going to help me today. So, finally, I called the Arizona Sports Medicine Clinic. Yahoo! Tomorrow I shall hopefully have a diagnosis.

Apparently there are three grades of injuries. Grade 1 is just a strain. Grade 2 is a small tear, and Grade 3 is a full tear. I have no bruising, but I cannot walk or stand on my toes. So, now I wait….wait for some answers. In the meantime, I RICE and hope Tatum can be patient with me.


I’m a fuddy duddy

Ok, so I think I’m getting officially old; perhaps it’s because I am a mother now, or perhaps it’s because I teach kids. Yesterday, the Super Bowl half time show was less than appealing. What has happened to our society? Why is it that entertainment these days has to push the sexual envelope?

I know that the Super Bowl has viewers who are KIDS. Do they need to see scantily clad woman gyrating their hips and (oh, were they singing? I don’t think people noticed that part.)

Dennis Prager talked about the degradation of the arts, and it’s not just in the movies. I worry about the values which are being communicated to our kids.

Coti needs some lovin’

It must be hard for the little guy. He’s become second fiddle, and he is not taking it well.

“Hey, what about me!?”

It has been a little over two months now, and although he likes Tater Tot, he does EVERYTHING to get my attention. Sadly, it’s not always so positive. Isn’t that just like our little kiddos….they really want the world to revolve around THEM. He just loved being my first love, and now? He still is my FIRST, but he can’t be FIRST! His patience may be slightly growing and so are his ideas. For example, the other day, my mom was reading the newspaper, and he figured that if he jumps on top of the pile, we will notice him!

Eventually, he gave up and assumed his famous “bear rug” pose.

Ok, Coti, I get the message! We will play some ball!
But please always remember: YOU are my darling little Cotster, and you and Tatum will be a superb combination! Now stay cute, and BEHAVE! 🙂

Returning to work

It’s around the corner! I can’t believe I’ll be going back to work in three weeks. I signed Tatum up today at Temple Chai and found myself weeping. “We’ll send many pictures,” was what they promise but for some reason this is no consolation. How is this helping me bond with my child? “We’ll have a picture of you on the wall so Tatum can see you.” Again…not helping! “Oh this is normal…all new moms go through this.” Sheesh..stop! I am not assured that leaving my child in the hands of other people is endearing my child to ME!

Now, she will get cuddled, fed, changed, and rested…all in the hands of someone else. This is definitely reassuring. However, I’m finding that my priorities are changing and my ambition level is cooling off. Ironically, I miss work tremendously, and moreover, I miss being productive! BUT…I’m finding a disconnect in that I want both/and. Funny, are we ever just OK with the way things are? This is when I know that HE created this God shaped vacuum in my heart that NOTHING can fill but His Spirit in me. I can be a FT mom or a FT teacher…or PT both, and still, I’ll feel inadequate and guilty that I’m not doing enough.

Father, help me to not be filled with “guilt” or “fear” as I move to the next phase of motherhood and career-woman. Help me to take one day at a time and make the MOST of that day. Thank you for the blessing of little Tater Tot.